***TW: MENTIONS SELF HARM***
“I have been struggling with mental illnesses my whole life. I’ve been dealing with anxiety ever since I can remember. I lived a lot of my life feeling like a freak. I soon became depressed and my feelings spiraled downward. I had no idea why I felt so numb and sad all the time. I felt broken.
After keeping it all in for so long I finally told my parents. I went to doctors and got diagnosed. We tried 17 different medications and nothing worked. I continued to feel broken. I spiraled further downward and began self harming – I felt so out of control with my life, I felt it was the one thing I could control. I talked to my parents and therapist and decided to stop self harming.
During all of that I had developed anorexia to have control over my life and because I hated the way I looked. I had been bullied and was in an abusive relationship, and I felt that I was too “fat” and “disgusting.”
After being hospitalized in a mental institution twice, I’m really working hard on recovering. I’m in an eating disorder program, I talk to my parents and therapists frequently about how I’m feeling. I’m in a loving and supportive relationship.
Most importantly I’m trying to get better for myself. I know I deserve a good life and I’m going to fight as hard as I can until I’m happy again.
Help the blog to exist; Become a patreon! https://www.patreon.com/ThisIsWhatAPersonWithMentalIllnessLooksLike?ty=h